First month of motherhood..

This is still pretty surreal to me. I am a parent. I love it. Cliches are true. I just want to cry looking at him because of the amount of love I have for him is unreal.

Its been over a month already!

We did it though,  Finally starting to feel like I am getting the hang of this. Zach went back to work the week after Blake was born. But I got this! Fortunately he is on a show locally and is home every evening and has a couple days off every week. It has been really nice.

It was the first week that was brutal.. Sleep was non existent. I was hallucinating constantly, Hearing his cries at times he was sound asleep. Luckily my mother was home with us a few days after our homing. She prepared some meals for the coming week and was awesome company. One of my besties Alexis has visited me several times and made me dinner which has been awesome and Auntie Kelsey comes to relieve me so I can get some extra chores done while she spoils my little stinker.

Becoming a mother for the first time isn't as dramatic as most people say. I mean sure my life is totally different now, I am taking care of another human life. The sleeping tale is most defiantly true, I defiantly miss sleep I can never get enough these days. But the can't seem to shower or clean my house thing is kind of a laugh to me. Obviously every one is different but my ass still gets showers daily and I keep my house together. I mean it isn't immaculate as it normally is but it defiantly doesn't look like a pig lives here. That part really isn't difficult. I haven't broke down in complete chaos or lost my mind..

Breast feeding has been a challenge unfortunately. At first it seemed to be going okay. But it is painful. I wasn't producing enough which equals a very unhappy baby on top of his colic issues. I swear we have the gassiest baby that has ever lived. He burps and farts like an adult man. There are times I am laying in bed and I hear the loudest one rip and for a few moments ponder on weather it was my husband or the baby.. It was the baby he just Shart his pants. Thats right this baby sharts him self multiple times daily.. I was never aware something so tiny could projectile shit everywhere... Oh. my. God. I experienced this during one of his middle of the night diaper changes. Quietly changing his shitty diaper ready to get back in bed it happens, I yell "oh my gawwwddd!" Shit every where. On my hands and arm. The changing table. The floor. The bed. The bed skirt. Zach immediately jumps out of bed asking what happened. I tell him. His response. "What do you want me to do?" Umm seriously. haha jesus. Poor guy is so sleep deprived of working and helping with the baby his brain wasn't functioning correctly. Really babe grab some carpet cleaner paper towels help me clean this shit up.. Literally. haha Oh man. I am not ready for more experiences like that. Yet I know they are coming. This little guy can really destroy a diaper. To the point we open the diaper and just decide to hose his cute little ass off in the bath. It's cute even with poop on it!

Anyway I have had to supplement formula with my breast milk until I make more. Which I was very upset about. I did not want formula to be an option. But luckily there is a great brand by Honest. Which is organic and seems pretty safe and great for the baby. He likes it and its honestly been helping both of us sleep. I am also taking Lactation supplements and drinking mothers milk tea daily (which makes your pee smell like syrup. Then I oddly crave pancakes every time I use the rest room) as well as trying to keep up on baking my self lactation cookies. They are delicious. I should market them I feel they are helping and I am tired of making them my self.

We have already had a few outings. I refuse to stay indoors for months straight. I am getting him use to sounds and his car seat. Which he hates. The stroller. Zach and I love to go out and eat that is our thing. Aside from that we pretty much are hermits. But it will be nice to know I can go out for lunch or grab things at the grocery store and not worrying about if he is going to cooperate and throw a crying fit. So far it is going well. I was hesitant about breast feeding in public at first. But you gotta do what you gotta do. I admit I feel like I was going to get detention or something for feeding my baby in a restaurant. But grab your nursing cover throw em on your boob and your good to go! bam! you can go anywhere!
One month check up. Almost 10 pounds !

Love his smiles.. Heart melting.....

My dogs are doing just fine. I hate peoples comments on how Ill want to get rid of them once the baby is here, That is defiantly not the case. I love them so much. Moose is a little difficult at times but not much you can do with an autistic dog. I do feel bad for I can not give them as much attention as I would like, But they have each other and they are still spoiled little shits still getting their waffle with pumpkin every morning. 

First sushi feast!

So over all things are going great and it is not as tough as I imagined it. It isn't perfect, Difficult getting used to the lack of sleep but I think I have got this mom thing down. I shed a tear or two when going through his clothes this past few days, having to get rid of his new born out fits and jammies.
Smiling occurred faster than I imagined it would. This baby LOVES music. We put his jams on, his favorite Rockabye Baby Weezer. Awesome music btw parents. Basically your favorite bands turned into baby lullabies. So then its tolerable instead of some cheesy ass annoying sounding baby music. So I make him dance and he just smiles and smiles. This week he is starting to figure out how to make sounds. It is amazing to witness the firsts. Always looking forward to new firsts as time passes. Everything is going well. Everyone is happy and healthy. Cant wait too see family for the holidays!

our first family selfie
so lucky.


Some products Id like to share..

I believe these are helping. Organic and natural. 

This pretty nifty mobile is seriously awesome. It projects stars on the ceiling and glows and has awesome music for our little music lover. Only complaint is batteries. 

This brand is great. The nipple butter helps so much and the milk maid tea doesn't taste too bad. 

ttfn !